My Mind Is Connected To My Mouth

I read this article today and realized I was a victim of some of the 6 thoughts that derail the mind. No wonder I am often always anxious. You can view the article here

http://www.youbeauty.com/mind/negative-thoughts?utm_source=outbrain&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=OutBrain%2BCPC&utm_term=Six-Thoughts-That-Can-Derail-Your-Mood

Key points though are:

Focus on the negative will make you gloss over the good. It’s easy to remember the bad, gloom and doom.
Making mountains out of molehills will always leave you in a bind. Blowing things out of proportion (also known as “catastrophizing”) can really get you down.
The world is not black and white, there are a lot of greys (my boyfriend says this a lot). Quit boxing yourself into a corner; there are never just 2 extreme opposing solutions to a problem, there’s always a grey alternative – think.
Control freak/micro-manager, let go of the controls just a little. This is a trust issue, I know, but it has to be done.
The battle between what you should do and what you want to do. Please yourself ever so often, you will be the happier for it.
Always feel like you have something to prove? That’s an exhausting life my friend. Take it easy. You can’t always be right. Nobody likes a know-it-all cos last time we checked, you weren’t Google. Lol

This got me thinking about how often I find myself in bad moods just by letting something tiny get to me, by over analyzing, assuming or just being fixated on something or the other. When I get like that I reach for food.

Yes, I am an emotional eater. It’s a badge, an identity; try as I might, I haven’t been able to shake off.

- Upset, I eat
- Fatigued, I eat
- Stressed, I eat
- Emotionally worked up, I eat

I know I shouldn’t eat whatever I’m putting in my mouth at that moment but I just can’t help myself. What I know and what I do at those instances is always at variance with each other. It’s no wonder I’m chubby. But I digress.

Been doing some soul search and reading up on the whole problem of emotional eating and made some discoveries about triggers of this habit.

Stress often times brings about cravings, according to the article I read stress stimulates the ‘stress hormone’ known as cortisol. High levels of cortisol can create cravings for salty and sweet foods.

Anxiety also known as nervous energy is a trigger I am very familiar with. This plays out by way of nail biting, teeth grinding or just being orally fidgety. Truth be told, I do not possess ladylike nails anymore. I have attempted to grow them out a few times by even fixing my nails but ended up eating the artificial nail when I got into a nervous fit. Yeah, that bad.

When I feel bad I eat and for me it’s my way of stuffing the pain or hurt. So, each bite of whatever if pushing down the pain so I don’t have to deal with it. I focus on the junk food I’m eating savoring every bite. Being stuffed is the aim here; the more you eat, the better you feel and you have something else to divert your annoyance to and feel bad about – the excess calories you just consumed that you will now have to torture out of your system. Food has taken the focus off of anger, resentment, fear and or anxiety. It’s a coping mechanism.

Growing up, food was often used as a reward for good behavior or good grades. Sweets, cakes and generally junk food were always handy as treats. Till date I still reward myself with a treat for good behavior. Let’s say I hit a target weight, I reward myself with ice-cream and cake because I was disciplined with my deprivation strategy. Bad move I know, but there’s no fun in rewarding yourself with carrots or health food, the bad stuff is sometimes an excellent motivator.

When I’m in a bad mood or I swing moods, I reach for food, it is my source of stability at those points but the truth is that they are not as satisfying until you are stuffed and bursting at the seams.