Work

1. What day of the week do you wake up singing ‘boo ya! Its gonna be a great day?”
2. What day of the week do you wish would never end?
3. What day of the week do you go to bed crying and dreading the dawn?

The correct answers would be
a. Friday
b. Saturday
c. Sunday

And then you wake up in the morning saying this …

Trust me it has nothing to do with hating your job, cos I don't, but everything to do with the fact that Mondays are a drag and the fact that you often feel shortchanged in the sleep department come Monday morning.

It also takes a while to reboot and get your head in the game after the weekend lull (that's if your weekend was dull). Mondays are synonymous with reports, lots of meetings and appeasing clients for being deliberately incommunicado for the duration of the weekend.

I can’t help myself. I loathe Mondays.
Do you feel me? Or am I the only one who curses the first work day of the week?

The Stalker

I had a day. You know one of those days that you’re at your wits end; you can explode at the least provocation so all you wanted to do was get home, curl into bed, sleep and forget.

The drive home, fortunately was smooth, otherwise, all the drivers on the way would have experienced my representation of road rage. As I drove in and shut the gate, I heard a knock at the gate. Who would be knocking at this late hour I remembered thinking. The dog was having a field day barking away and that was contributing to the pounding in my head.

I looked through the peephole and lo and behold it was Prince Charming. I prayed for strength.

He knocked and knocked but I refused to open. I was honestly terrified. “How did he find out where I lived”? I was home alone; as the continued to knock I began to imagine some horrible scenarios where I’m gutted and the last words I’ll ever hear would be ‘If I don’t have you, no one else will”.

When all became silent, I cautiously opened the gate and confirmed he had left. Relief.

Then the calls began.

I finally picked.
“Why didn’t you open the gate? You saw me coming towards you and you closed the gate on my face.” “I’m only trying to be nice to you. Why won’t you let me in?” According to him, he waited for me and finally spotted me driving in, so he came to say ‘hi’.

He went on to emphasize that he brought some shoes for me to select. This was his way of telling me to take him seriously – I am capable.

I let him have it. There were no restraints in my voice or choice of words neither was I civilized. At the end of my speech which was a combination of insults and name calling, this stalking was definitely at its end. No self respecting guy would take accept being called desperate or compared to a woman.

After my tirade, he said he was only trying to tell me he’d bought me a pair of shoes and wanted to be sure they’d fit since he wasn’t sure what my size was. He later sent the pictures of the shoes and apologized for stalking.

When I opened the picture, they looked horrible.
I called to confirm the worst and yes , they were Okirika.

It was finally over.

I Beg To Apply

I beg to apply.

That was the opening line of my first series of application letters I sent out upon leaving school in 2005. Thinking back now, I shouldn’t have begged.

It’s upsetting the way employers treat their staff. Everything said or done is with the tone of condescension. Just because I begged to apply.

You may say I’m being ungrateful. These were the people who gave you a chance to shine, grow and strut your stuff, ‘rolling my eyes in disdain’. They may have done all that but it doesn’t mean I should forever be reminded of it or play the benevolent slave – just because …

I’m upset and tired.

Tired of being made to look like a fool. I am intelligent; I might not have graduated with a First Class like all the pompous private university snubs they treat like descendants from heaven and are handled with kid gloves; but I know stuff. I won’t bore you with the woes surrounding my descent to a second class cos everyone has a story, but I digress.

Just because I chose to ‘beg’ to apply doesn’t mean I must remain in a subservient state forever? Or does it?

The average employer derives some level of joy from talking down at you, making you feel less than significant, or just downright humiliating before your peers. You can’t really hold it against them cos as my mum says ‘Who begged you to apply? If you can’t take it, quit.’

It’s easier said than done. Trust me, I speak from experience. Have you ever been so mad that you have walked to your desk, typed out your resignation letter and just before you print it, the blinding rage stops and reason kicks in. the voice of reason kicks in and begins to reel out to you the consequences of your rash action. Questions like

- How would you fuel your car?
- How long can you survive on your savings?
- What would your family say?
- What would you do till you found another job?
- What if this is it and you never find another job?

The list is endless. But the fear gets you in the end.

I have never been livid with such blinding rage nor gotten to the point described above, but I have friends and colleagues who have. One friend actually defied the voice of reason and went on to resign. Her outcome is another story.

I am upset. Upset that I am more afraid of the consequences of my decision to stay, than the long term outcome of the bitterness and anger that festers in my heart – my blood pressure mounts daily yet I bite down hard and swallow.

Why am I such a coward?

The truth is, there are no perfect jobs, bosses or colleagues; whatever you are running from, might just be waiting for you at the next job you take up. It might even be worse, you just never know. (Voice of reason)

But when it comes to office working conditions, ‘May The Odds Ever Be In Your Favor’ (I borrow from Hunger Games).

Looking back, I wish I didn’t beg to apply. Who knows if I had boldly applied I wouldn’t be ranting right now.

If I beg to resign would they beg me to stay?

I wonder?

WHO ARE YOU REALLY MAD AT

Sometimes people act in a certain way and you wonder and can’t help thinking ‘Like seriously!!!’

A lot of people walk around with a lot of latent aggression boiling just beneath the surface waiting for the slightest provocation. Suppressed annoyances and transferred aggression is often the order of the day. Truth is, most of us do not realize we are acting out and sometimes do not bother to trace the root cause of our annoyances. Should we give ourselves a minute to think, we will often find out that particular incidents do not match our responses and reactions at the moment we act out.

I read an article that described this scenario; A man was walking on the street with his nine year old son and six year old daughter. The boy looked up and spoke to his father and the father got really pissed (presumably at what the boy said) and started yelling at the boy. You could see the boy was physically affected by the words his father was saying. As soon as his father stopped yelling, the boy turned round and hit his sister.

Shocking right? Not entirely. That story is an example of how a number of us live our lives.
Upset with your boss, take it out on your subordinates.
Upset with your wife, yell at your kids.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s ok and healthy to vent but direct it to the right source.
Quit substituting and repressing your annoyance.
Quit instinctive responses. If you are the receiving end, pause and realize that you are a substitute. This realization often releases you from feeling upset.

It’s a vicious cycle of transferred aggression and the sooner we all took time to pause before reacting and ask ourselves, ‘Is person (A) a punching bag for person (B) who I’m truly upset with?’, we will curb this cycle of negative energy that can be detrimental in the long run.

Break the chain.

Why People Change Jobs

‘People are our greatest asset’. This is perhaps the most popular cliché many companies use today when extolling their employee centric culture. However, very few companies show any real commitment when it comes to empowering their employees, leveraging their abilities or creating a conducive work environment / culture. The question is why?

In a survey done on organizations that embrace employee retention strategies, it was discovered that 10% – 20% of their time is spent on developing strategies but none actually set out guidelines or timetables of execution.

Employers often make the mistake of assuming that offering higher pay is guaranteed to keep their workforce willfully engaged and loyal. While pay might form part of the reasons for employee exits, research figures show the following as most occurring reasons why employees leave for competition.

My boss/supervisor/team leader is incompetent, difficult or unresponsive: Of all the workplace stressors, a bad boss is possibly the worst, directly impacting the emotional health and productivity of employees. A survey of over a million employees and 80,000 managers traced the highest employee exits to immediate managers. Employees will work out sometimes without alternative job offers to get away from a difficult boss.

It doesn't feel good around here: Some employees experience difficulty aligning with the company’s corporate culture. This translates sometimes into their opinions of physical conditions around the workplace - comfort, convenience, safety, and the clarity of mission.

They wouldn't miss me if I were gone: Recognition of ideas and individual contributions go a long way in boosting moral and keeping your workforce engaged. If they feel you regard them as expendable, they'll leave for a position where they're appreciated. If you value their contribution, say it often.

I don't get the support I need to get my job done: Frustration often sets in when employees are hindered in their job delivery by too many rules, sketchy communication, incompetent supervisors or co-workers.

There's no opportunity for advancement: Not just upward promotions are considered as advancement options. Opportunities to learn, to sharpen skills and pick-up new one for is a key consideration. In cases like this lateral movement holds more appeal than upward movement.

I don’t get along with the people I work with: This often plays a major role in employee defection. The work environment might be favorable but shaky relationships between co-workers can make coming to work a herculean act.

I am stressed from overwork and Work/Life imbalance: Employees often consistently work late, work through lunch, work through sickness and take work home. A toxic work environment which makes employees choose between a career and a life is the breeding ground for disgruntled workers and eventual mass exit of good hands.

Compensation: Workers want fair compensation for work done but it’s often observed that when most of the above listed criteria are left unaddressed higher wages are not strong enough to keep employees.

Companies Who Got It Right

The Marriot, a worldwide operator and franchisor of a broad portfolio of hotels, Southwest airlines, the coffee franchise Starbucks and Google have at the heart of their operation the employee centric approach.

Marriot and Southwest hire based on attitude and not skill because in the service industry, your employees are your brand ambassadors who should embody the spirit of the company rather than its functions.

Starbucks offers healthcare and retirement benefits to its part-time workers. Their employee turnover rate has summarily reduced yearly, which is a rare feat in that industry.

The internet giant, Google, on the other hand believes that employee’s satisfaction goes beyond providing health care and vacation time. They offer free meals, shuttle buses, in-house doctors, 24-hour gym, massage service, and dry cleaning to its more than 12,000 employees. In 2008, Fortune Magazine listed them as the best company to work.

Take Learning

Reasons listed above are by no means conclusive as to why people leave companies, individuals have various qualities they look out for when seeking employment. Employers can however reduce employee turnover by

- Creating a conducive, non-hostile and stable working environment
- Establishing clear expectations from employees
- Hiring personnel who share their values
- Appropriately aligning matching job roles and projects to employee strengths and interests
- Focus on making your managers, supervisors and/or team leaders better

There are no guarantees when dealing with people but by adopting and implementing an employee centric model employee engagement will be on the high. However, there will still be employees who feel they can better themselves just by chasing more income.

Jack Welch of GE once said “Any company trying to compete must figure out a way to engage the mind of every employee.” Much of a company’s value lies “between the ears of its employees” and it is to the greater good for companies to do all they can to keep impacted knowledge within the family.

I’ll rephrase the old service mantra that says ‘The Customer is King’ but in today’s modern world, ‘The Employee is King’.